Question from Eva:
Hi, I’m getting married next Aug and I was wondering how do I make it clear to my guest not to bring anyone else with them except for whose invited in the invitation…like my single girlfriend’s not to bring a date….because we can’t afford to pay for them since the food is really expensive and we want it just to be close family and good friends.
Answer from Bridal Expert Angela:
Hi Eva, and congratulations on your upcoming wedding. When you address the invitation, you will say who you are inviting. ie. Mary Jones. If you put Mary Jones and Guest, then they can bring someone. This is the proper etiquette.
Saying that, there are always people who don’t follow the rules, or ignore them. Allow for 10% overage in your budget for people who bring someone thinking it doesn’t matter. It always happens.
Since your wedding includes close family and friends only, I would tell your immediate family and bridal party that ‘if anyone asks, your guest list only includes those names that are on the invitation envelope‘. They can, in turn, answer anyone’s questions about it, or if close friends are talking to them about bringing an uninvited guest, they can say, "Oh, didn’t you read the invitation envelope? The wedding is only for invited guests." That way word will get out. It is not appropriate to be more specific on the invitation.
Remember there is the RSVP, so you should know in advance if anyone is bringing someone extra along. If you really wanted to make a point of it, you could call them and say that you invited them, so why are there two people on your RSVP. Your guest might be taken aback, but bringing an uninvited guest to a party is the height of rudeness.
If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask.
Angela Fiebelkorn, Ask The Expert
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