Question from Janelle:
Hi, I have about 30 out-of-town guests, and I don’t know what I should do to help them attend, and make the wedding fun for them. Most of them are arriving on Thursday (wedding is Saturday), and leaving on the Monday after the wedding. Please help!
Answer from Bridal Expert Angela:
Hi Janelle, and congratulations on your upcoming wedding! It is not necessary to plan constant entertainment for out-of-town wedding guests who are not part of your wedding party, but it is common to give them information about accommodations, and activities they can attend if they so choose.
It is usually the responsibility of the groom to make arrangements for out-of-town guests. Out-of-town guests are expected to pay for their own lodging, but it is common for the groom to recommend and arrange for a discounted room rate at a hotel. Usually a block of rooms are pre-booked at the hotel where you are holding your wedding. Sometimes, family and friends might offer their home for specific guests that they know well, or just state they can host someone. If private arrangements are not made, you can include a list of family and friends (with addresses and phone numbers) who are willing to host someone, and include it with the wedding package for out-of-town guests. If someone is hosting an out-of-town guest at your wedding, you should be sending them a thank you note and a gift for extending their hospitality.
After you announce your wedding, you are usually approached by family and friends offering to help you plan your wedding. Asking these people to host an activity for two or more out-of-town guests is the thing to do. They can offer to plan something during the rehearsal dinner, they day before the wedding, during the day of an evening wedding, or the day after the wedding (usually a post-wedding brunch). Sometimes, the groom will arrange something for these guests instead—including them in the rehearsal dinner, planning a round of golf or shopping during the day before an evening wedding, or inviting them to a post-wedding brunch or ‘after wedding party’.
Family and friends might host a dinner for one or two couples on your out-of-town guest list while you are at the wedding rehearsal is the way to go. Sometimes, someone might offer to throw a party for all the out-of-town guests in their home on the day before the wedding. If this happens, be sure to send thank-you gifts (or flowers) to the party hosts, along with a thank you card.
Usually, when out-of-town guests arrive at their hotel, the couple will have a welcome basket for them. It could have toiletries, or other small items, or have a combination of fruit and individual coffee packages. Included with the welcome basket should be an itinerary of wedding events so they know where to go to attend the activities. Usually, transportation is arranged for them, and pickup times and drop off times and places are listed so they can plan accordingly.
Overall, you want to include them in appropriate wedding events, and arrange for them to visit with family and friends during their stay. Because many do not have transportation, and don’t know your city well, you should make traveling to and from wedding events easy and convenient.
If you have further questions, feel free to ask.
Angela Fiebelkorn, certified wedding planner
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