What Is The Guest Etiquette for A Same Sex Wedding

Question from Carol:

Hi, I’ve been invited to a same-sex wedding, and I am wondering if there is anything I should expect that is different from a regular wedding?

Answer from Bridal Expert Angela:

Hi Carol. Guest etiquette is the same for both traditional weddings, and same-sex weddings.

Sometimes, guest who are invited are opposed to a same-sex marriage, or may feel uncomfortable attending. If this is the the case, it is best to just decline the wedding invitation graciously without excuses. Whether you attend or not, if you received a wedding invitation, you are obliged to send a wedding gift. Wedding gifts are usually sent to the couple in the weeks before the wedding day.

Your attire as a guest should reflect the formality of the wedding, and the time of day in which it is held—the same as a traditional wedding.

Sometimes, at a same-sex wedding, the wedding couple do not have a receiving line. If this is the case, be sure to extend your best wishes to both the couple and their families at some point during the reception.

The basic etiquette at all weddings include:

being respectful at the ceremony by not interrupting through use of flash cameras
turning off all pagers and cell phones
being respectful of religious traditions that are not your own (stand when others stand, sit when others sit; you are not required to kneel or recite prayers that are not your own beliefs)
not bringing a surprise guest (your invitation will state who is invited to the wedding—you and a guest/spouse/partner, or just you)
don’t monopolize the couple in the receiving line or during the wedding—they have a lot of guests to talk to
don’t alter place cards or switch tables if seating is assigned
be sociable with others at the wedding ceremony and reception
dance when asked to dance, and if required, offer assistance to the elderly and infirm
do not ask for a ‘doggie bag’ to take food home
do not take centerpieces, or flowers at the end of the ceremony (the couple may have made arrangements for them)

Overall, wedding behaviour and etiquette is the same no matter whether what kind of wedding you are invited to. If you have further questions feel free to ask.

Angela Fiebelkorn, certified wedding planner